Busy weekend...

...began on Friday evening at Mother's: much talk of Christmas plans, news of baby great-grandchild etc. On Saturday I made my November visit to my father's grave, russet and golden and orange leaves strewing the path in beautiful sunshine as I walked along. In death as in life, we are among friends and neighbours in the suburbs - the other graves in this quiet and beautiful graveyard carry so many familiar names. The local parish always has an All Souls grave-blessing, the priest sprinkling the graves with holy water...

Jamie has been away in Ireland for a few days so I seized the opportunity of a big cleaning-and-tidying session. Took several things to local charity shop, threw away lots of unwanted paper, etc. An old propaganda booklet from the Equal Opportunities Commission gave me pause for thought: produced in the late 70s, when all this non-sexist-let's-pretend-we-are-all-identical stuff came in, it looks terribly dated now, when the worry is about boys falling behind with basic skills like reading and writing and the realisation that they badly need good adult male role-models and that school is seen as all too "girly". And the pictures made one a bit sad: thirty years ago, the children's faces were actually different: less tense, more "open", the girls less angry, there's somehow a more innocent air ...

On Sunday, cycled to Mass - a beautiful arrangement of poppies with a flag at the side of the nave, making an understated and quietly poignant message - and then on to friends where I had been invited to lunch. A long talkative afternoon over a buffet, with quantities of children running about and shouting, hot sausages and chicken and salads and rolls on the table, babies being cuddled, adults enjoying wine and chat and laughter. The children all gathered like pins to a magnet when a box of doughnuts was brought in at the end of the afternoon, drawn as from nowhere.

Cycling home through the dark, I found Jamie, who had brought me some heavenly lavender-scented soap from Ireland and a lovely dark red candle all specially decorated which we'll use for Christmas. We had big mugs of tea and told each other all our news.